Back again :P...Some thoughts and The demon inside....

Wow, well its been quite some time since I've posted anything on here. Writers block is a bitch at times! But alas we all suffer from it sometimes. So what have I been up to in my absence? Honestly not that much. Work and sleep and trying to keep to my new exercise and healthy eating regime have been taking up most of my time. My exam results will be out soon and I know I've failed a couple of the exams I took, they were very hard and to be honest I don't love what I'm doing and it makes it ten times harder. On the plus side things are going well with the guy I'm seeing but its complicated, extremely complicated but I'll save that story for later. 

I've been reading some romance novels lately and I am disappointed. Writers whom started out amazing have now begun to drift into the same old thing different characters. One in particular who I have adored for years has really made me wonder at her writing talent. I read two of her books in about four days and the similarities between them were identical except for the names of the characters. The guy is a rake, a rouge, one man that all the ladies would like between their legs but would be too scandalous to marry. The Lady, gently bred, but has of late realised that her families fortune has diminished and is in need of a rich husband and so goes out looking for him. Alas they both meet one another and the girl treats him with distaste as the guy follows her about like a love sick puppy (where the hell has the rake gone?). Finally the girl realises her absolute, irrevocable love for him and thus she submits body and soul and they say they love one another after three days of meeting? Holy crap! If that happened me I think I would run a mile and be like what the fuck! You must be crazy if you love me after just a few days. So anyway they end up in a tryst. He performs oral sex on her, then breaks her maiden head which by the way is not inches up your vagina but is obviously at the entrance. Where the hell did this whole thing come from? Romance novels making up their own take on the human anatomy. She crys out, tears glistening on her eyes then after two minutes tells him to just take her. He does and they both finish together their first time. I'm sorry but that takes a lot of practice and is sometimes not even possible, but fine its romantic, whatever. They then get married and have children. But of course there is also the back story which is always the same and which drags the man away from the woman and threatens to tear them apart. Been there done that bought the romance novel! Well I think historical romance could do with a little kick in the butt to get them interesting again. 

So enough of my little rant! I think i owe all of you a little something so here it is! I also promise an update on a wolves tale, I am still unsure as to where I would like to take it at the moment but I'm thinking. 

The Demon inside 

  

I wait for you in a fathomless ibis,

your silent screams my energy,

The feel of your terror a wondering bliss,

Your voice to me like a singing clergy,

As my dark tendrils touch you like a lingering kiss.

I am your sole and secret friend,

The only one you can truly and lovingly trust,

You love me as much as you hate me as I bend,

As I twist and hunger like a lover with my lust,

I love you my wonderful end.

You remember as you look in the dark pit of the mirror,

Before you, you see that shining in your eyes,

That tells you I am with you, the sharer,

The demon inside, who wants you to die,

Yes thats right, I whisper as you understand, let loose the terror.

The knife glints, reflecting the only light from the moon,

You try to fight but it makes me stronger,

The fear making the end come soon,

Yes do it, I can't take it much longer,

Your life will ebb away just like the last remains of June. 

You gasp, then look down,

The knife has clattered to the floor,

The blood on your hand bright on your gown,

mmmm...It felt so good, I need more,

The only sound you hear the laughing of a clown.

Yes my love I know your fear,

Thats it let the darkness take you,

I drink the last drops of your life as my outline becomes clear,

I leave you now, whole, your body in two,

Your eyes close leaving only a small silver tear. 

A little bit morbid but I read recently of demons who take over a persons body, convincing them to kill themselves. This is what my strange overactive mind came up with :P. It basically shows turmoil within a person, but is it really a demon inside or is it simply the anger inside wanting to be out? Did she die or was she reborn? What pushed her to the darkness she let overcome her? A few small questions for you to think about :P

Happy Terrifying Thursday! 

Freya xx 

A wolves tale part 4

I sat watching the clock on my computer praying that the day would finally be over, the itching over my body had grown worse and worse over the course of the day and I feared one wrong word would set me off on a rampage. Finally it changed to five and I quickly hit print. I fetched the paper I had been working on and slipped it into the box on Andy's door not wanting to disturb him for fear of getting caught at the office for another few hours. I returned to my desk and grabbed my bag from it's drawer and amost sprinted into the street. All around me passerbys hurried on their way all with the one goal of reaching their homes after a long day of grueling work.

I opened my purse and grabbed my cellphone quickly typing a number from memory and after three agonizing rings Jason answered and I all but growled one word into the phone "Chatta". Before I hung up I heard him curse as he understood that now was not the time to hesitate...my change was comming and comming fast. Finally reaching my car I pulled the door open roughly. I hopped in and was tearing out of the carpark before anyone even noticed that someone had been there.

"Damn it Tala!" Jason growled in anger as he found me slumped over the steering wheel at our usual parking spot. "why the hell do you wait so long before changing!, you know damn well that changes only at full moon are fucking lie" he ranted as he opened my door and easily lifted me out.

"you know, there is an advantage at having you around Jason when I need someone to carry me" I retorted, my voice tinged with pain.

"come on Tala no need to be a smartass. It's your own fault you know. Jason has every right to be angry" Sam said calmly, always the problem solver of our small group.

"you are such a fucking idiot Tal. I swear the moment you get your pretty little ass changed I'm gonna beat it for ya!" hunter snapped with the firey anger he was so well known for.

"Jesus just look at your eyes.." Jason continued as he tilted my face upwards to look at him. "how close were you all day? You know how it could effect us if you change near ordinary people. You would be shot down and killed or worse be made into a science expieriment! Not to mention the possible murders you could commit in that sort of state. You can be so stupid sometimes"

"yes dad" I replied mockingly as my body began to tense in his arms. "could you please put me down so I can get this over with?" I asked sweetly. Bearing my teeth in a smile looking every bit as feral as the wolf trying to get out.

"Fine" he replied in an exasperated voice as he simply dumped me onto a soft pile of grass near a riverbank almost three miles into the Chatthoochee forest, one of Georgias most beautiful and vast woodland areas.

"ooof" I exclaimed, "if I wasn't in so much pain right now I'd hurt you" I grumbled.

"ya..ya save it for after you have changed" Jason called put as he and the boys walked further into the forest to begin their own change.

Ok..I thought here it goes. I breathed in deep as I pulled off my clothing already feeling the change running through my limbs. I sat up on my hands and knees and arched my back as a wave of pain shot through me. " mmmmm" I moaned as the air rippled around me and my bones began to snap. This was never a good expierience, espically if it was left so long. I cried out as fur sprung from my soft skin and covered my body. Half in and half out of the change I could only represent the most disgusting of monsters. One more ripple through the air and my moans changed to a howl as I finally reached it fully. I stood there panting for a second before shaking my body and springing from my crouched down position in the grass.

I reveled in the feel of the air through my dark brown and copper tinged fur. My lean body graceful and powerful as I ran through the grass and trees. My mind was mine but now accompanied by the wolf. We wanted to hunt....

I let out a yelp as not one but three other larger wolves pounced on me throwing me into the air and onto the ground before starting a scuffle. 'Not fair' I growled in my mind knowing that they would hear, 'three against one..'

'haha' I heard in reply...'with you Tal three against one is perfectly fair' Hunter replied as he tried to nip my ear, I turned my head and growled at him before grabbing him by the neck with my teeth and throwing him to the ground. He landed on his feet and turned to face me. His body poised to attack. 'you're out my friend' I mumered, 'you know the rules one nip and your out of the game'

The large silver wolf before me pawed the ground and shook his head as if to clear the animalistic urge to attack from his mind before turning and bounding off into the forest. I turned slowly and faced the light brown and white wolves behind me. 'alright boys, whose next' I wolfishly smiled.

The light brown wolf, Sam stepped forward and we began to circle one another. Neither knowing when the other would attack but watching carefully for any telltale signs. Suddenly Sam leaped and I skirted to the side alowing him to jump past and land, his paws hitting the loose soil and throwing up clouds of dust. 'not bad' I drawled in my mind taunting him. I heard him growl angryly before he leaped at me again. This time I was ready and I allowed him to pounce on me. I leaned to the side and rolled us over pinning him to the ground. I nipped at his ear drawing a tiny bit of blood...'touch' I said quitely and confidently as I hopped off of him and sauntered over to the edge of the clearing we had found ourselves in. I heard him cursing and I laughed in my mind, 'don't you know not to attack a woman when she hasn't changed in weeks' I sneered.

I felt rather then saw my last opponant sneaking behind me. He knew I could hear him. 'trying to trap me Jason?' I enquired without turning around. 'oh no Tal we both know I have already done that' he replied. 'arrogant bastard' I exclaimed. He laughed.

'don't you remember this morning?' he enquired. 'i don't think you have paid off that little remark yet'

I growled loud this time the sound reverberating through my body. He is just trying to rise you so he can win, the tiny voice of reason echoed in my mind. I shut my mind off from him and turned slowly, facing my opponant head on. I saw myself reflected in his black eyes as I crouched down low to the ground. He wined slightly his paws moving restlessly over the dark earth. He knew I had a trick up my sleeve.

Finally after what seemed like an age I leaped over him and sprinted deeper into the forest. I stopped at another clearing looking around me franticly not knowing where he was. I heard birds singing in the trees and a crack of a twig broken by a lesser animal but no sign of Jason. I paced uneasily in circles as I waited.

I whipped around as I heard a rustle of leaves. Jason bounded out from the shadows and jumped on me our bodies rolling over and over each trying to get a hit. Finally after what seemed like and age I grabbed his frount paw in my mouth and growled happily as he yelped in surprise. I hopped off of him and he lay still on the ground. I watched as he changed back into his human form. Deciding to change back myself. This time I slipped into human form easily and fluidly. Padding over to where he lay.

"come on now Jason, I bearly touched you" I said soothingly. Comfortable with my own nakedness I turned and stretched my tired muscles my arms reaching high up into the sky. I felt something loop over them and pull tight my hands ending up clasped together. "hey" I gasped as I felt strong arms around my tiny waist, carrying me over to a nearby tree. Jason lowered me gently on the ground before quickly binding my arms above my head tying the vine he used to the branch of the tree. I stood there panting my small breasts pulled upward by my arms. The nipples were hard demanding attention as my body reacted to the bondage.

Jasons eyes skimmed over me, and body reacted. I was deliciously wet with need. Wanting to feel him within me as the adrenalin of the fight left my veins. "beautiful" he drawled as if savouring the word. He was hard I could see it. His manhood large and needing. I whimpered and pulled at the vine that held me wanting to break Free and have him now. He laughed seeing clearly my predictiment. He walked over to me slowly his lips close to my ear. He kissed my neck right at the pulse point and I moaned softly as his hand skimmed over my flat tummy. "please" I begged standing on my toes trying to get his hand right where I needed it.

He looked into my eyes and smiled. "I suppose it's only fair" he began as his fingers moved up my thigh. "a touch for a touch" he said almost in a whisper as his fingers gently moved over the soft lips between my thighs. I moaned as not one but two of his long fingers entered me slipping in easily due to my mounting wettness. He withdrew them and softly circled my clit drawing another loud moan from my lips.

"please" I gasped needing to feel him within me. He understood not only because he could hear my thoughts but also because it was what he needed too. Denying me that very morning had cost him more then he wished to say. He grabbed hold of my thighs lifting me as he thrust into my womanly heat. I groaned at the sheer pleasure of it as I wrapped my legs around his hips. Unable to control the movements as I was bound and at his mercy. He began to thrust in and out of me faster and faster. Kissing me as he did our tounges mimicing the movements. Our breaths mingling as we gasped into each others mouths. I felt something growing within as I began to get closer to completion. I know Jason felt it too.

Finally I came my body clenching around him as he growled reaching his own completion. We stayed as we were panting. Finally he released me and untied my arms placing me gently on the ground as we heard the others comming closer. Jason playfully swatted my bottom as I ran off in search of my clothes just as the others ran naked into the clearing. I growled as they laughed but couldn't help but smile. Finding my clothes I threw them on quickly and sat waiting for them to reappear. ( to be continued)

freya xx          

Broken wings

My wings are broken,
They fly no more,
All that is left are words unspoken,
And a sorrow right at the core,
Of life, of time,
This love which was never mine,
Confusion, delusion,
Of a dream left with just a contusion.

A little mellow Monday posting.

Freya xx

A wolves tale part 3

Dimitri stood before the fireplace, a still and commanding presence within the large room. Only he could do it, cause fear to ripple through the minds of those near him. As it was, his minions stood at least three feet from him, as much space as they could manage without invoking his anger. In his gnarled hand he held a single wine glass filled with a ruby red liquid. Wine perhaps? Or maybe a more sinister beverage to the ordinary person. His dank hair fell from his head in greasy tendrils, matted and filthy. His suit was once an expensive array of fabrics, lovingly sewn for a master no longer himself. The years had taken their toll. He sighed as he contemplated this. His skin, stretched taunt and pale over bones and hallowed black eyes illuminating the flames below told just how much he had endured. He needed a new kind of life. He was dying now. He had tried Fey blood. The blood of pixies and elves. So many had to die to feed his greed and they had grown wary, Increasing their defences and the walls were now impenetrable.

Humans quenched the thirst and their terror brought much amusement to him. However he was no longer a young and virile vampire and needed more then what they could bring him.

Demons proved too much trouble for the small amount of life they provided and the after effects of incubi and succubi although fun for a while, proved an unnecessary annoyance when it was not needed.

Angels were an interesting bunch. But their blood had the uncanny effect of making ones skin glow an unnatural gold. And no one wants to get feathers everywhere, especially between teeth.

His own kind on the other hand although providing less life then the Angels gave him something more. By taking the blood of the strongest vampires it was possible for him to absorb their powers.

Now he was feared but it was worthless unless he could save himself. Everlasting life was a myth, eventually time catches up with a vampire just like everything else. He had been around thousands of years a direct descendant from the first vampire that walked the night. But time was catching up with him just as it did with Itanis.

“What news of the research” he inquired in his raspy voice. There was a hesitation and he lifted his head to stare at his commanding officer. “Well!” He all but shouted.

“S…Sir…“ Marcus began then jumped as his masters fist connected with the fireplace.

“I haven’t got all day, as you see time is my enemy” he said gesturing to the whole room as if it were the world with the hand holding the wine glass.

“We have reason to believe….” He tentatively said fearing a reaction. “That there is a group in Georgia displaying interesting characteristics. Their species contain both male and female counterparts. Their powers passed on through birth or attack”

“You idiot!” Dimitri barked at him as he suddenly appeared before the smaller man the glass of blood smashed on the floor. Taking hold of his neck in one wizened but strong hand he lifted him from the ground pulling him close to his face. “I am aware of Warewolves…you think I do not know of their kind. I have been alive longer then you have I not. Disgusting nasty creatures” He said his putrid breath blowing in Marcus’s face. Marcus made a gurgling apologetic sound before Dimitri threw him across the room smashing his body against the nearby wall.

“And what is so intriging about this particular group of mutts?” He asked almost sweetly.
“Sir…there is a woman.”

“Ah yes, a woman and how do you suppose a puny idiotic woman can help with this mess” Dimitri interrupted again gesturing to himself.

“There is something about her, we haven’t gotten all the details. But she is different then the others. She may not know it herself but there is something more that runs through her blood” Marcus explained.

Dimitri stared at Marcus evaluating what the vampire had said to him. Hmm... he thought, it would prove easy to secure a woman and at least he could have a little fun. He so enjoyed their high pitched screams…and if Marcus was right perhaps her blood had the final ingredient he was so greedy for.

“Bring her to me” He commanded… (to be continued)

Freya xx

a wolves tale - Part two

“Miss. Evans, my office now…” was what met me when I finally dragged myself into work. I checked my watch for the hundred time since I left my house that morning, “Its only two minutes after nine” I grumbled to myself. This morning was not working wonders on my already strained mood. I need to change and change soon I thought feeling my skin itching. I need to run and work this tension out before I end up changing in front of someone and scaring the crap out of them. I passed a mirror and saw my normally dark brown eyes were now glowing gold around the edges. Yep left it too long this time I thought shaking my head. My father is going to kill me. Not that our relationship is the best as it is but this will really be the icing on the cake if I go and kill someone today.

My father Manion is the Alpha male of our small pack. The leader and altogether tough guy. He has a grudge against woman, feels they are not as strong as the males and should not be thinking of doing more then running when the full moon is out. Were-housewives was all he thought of them. Cook and clean and look after the males. Of course many of the females agreed with this, including my step mother. But i am certainly not the simpering woe is me female type and cannot stand how the woman let the men take over their lives. Thank god for Jason, Sam and Hunter I thought as I placed my bag in the small drawer of my desk and locked it there. They understood that woman were worth more. Or maybe because I had managed to win many wrestling fights with them several times.

Smiling to myself I tapped on Andy’s door and went in when he shouted “Get your ass in here Evans I haven’t got all day”.

As she stepped into his office and turned to close the door Andy’s eyes skimmed over her pale and slender body. Her long dark brown hair softly falling mid way down her back. He noticed appreciatively that she was wearing black skinny jeans that skimmed neatly over the curves of her hips and bottom pushed upward by the height of the black heels she wore beneath. Over this she wore a deep purple smock tied at the back by a lavender sash. So the fabric hugged to her slender waist most provocatively. Damn this woman was made to break men’s hearts, or even to cause them major discomfort, he thought as he adjusted the way he sat. Lucky there’s a desk here or she would be getting more then a surprise this morning. He quickly averted his eyes as she turned around and began to shuffle the papers before him.

“Take a seat” he growled.

“Sir, I’m so sorry my mind has just been elsewhere this week. I wont be late again I will make sure of it…” I began as I sat directly before him.

“Save it for someone who cares Evans” he interrupted. “I didn’t call you in to complain to you about time keeping that is a job for human resources, I couldn't give a shit what you do so long as you produce the work”

“yes sir” I mumbled.

“I was just reading your article on the Stevens murder case and I must say I’m quite impressed. I haven’t seen writing from a twenty five year old like this…since well myself” he said smugly.

I shifted in my chair no longer sitting hunched up as if I feared he would fly across the room and grab me by the neck. Instead I now sat tall and confident.

“Well I…I’m glad you liked it sir I did spend a good deal of time writing and researching it…the case was an interesting one as you well know. I nearly jumped at the prospect of getting to write about it. Which I must thank you for…” I replied

“Well I wouldn’t be thanking me yet Evens” he replied throwing the paper across the desk to her. “Have these changes done to it and on my desk in an hour” he barked.

I looked down to see the page filled with red marks and notes. “and you are sitting here still?” he growled as I made no effort to move. My eyes flashed gold in anger and I fought to control my emotions. Finally I stood and walked to the door. “Yes sir” I replied “one hour”.

If it wasn’t for the fact that this job at the Daily journal was the best opportunity for me to get out there and show people what I could do I would be telling him exactly where he could shove his red pen I thought as I made my way to my desk. Where does he get off treating people like that. He is only thirty-five himself, only two years into the editors job, but damn is he kind of hot. I sighed and switched on my computer and began to type the changes….(to be continued)

Freya xx

A wolves tale...

Once upon a time....oh hell why does it always start like that? I suppose it was once upon a time but well saying that will invoke thoughts of this being a fairytale filled with PG type events. But no this is a tale of horror, love, sex  and violence. An ordinary girl or was she? Well as ordinary as you can get when you sometimes have the urge to shapeshift into a large and dare I say it graceful wolf, me narrsisstic never! 

How did I become this monster only heard of in fairy stories? I'd like to tell you it was through a battle for my life or even that a handsome were crept into my bedroom one night thirsty for my womanly flesh and got a bit carried away. But no, I was born this way. Knew it all my life that once I hit puberty not only would I grow boobs and welcome the red flow like normal girls I would have to deal with turning into a werewolf too. 

Don't get me wrong there are perks to this. My body stays in shape and I'm strong. The male weres are quite nice to look at too. I'm smiling now can't you tell? Anyway let's start this story I'm sure you would like to know more about me and my life and if not then well I guess you don't have to keep reading. Of course I would like you to but I can't force it......much. Let's go back 4 months to this very day. 

Mmmm I thought as I began to wake my muscles stretching as my body submitted to the yawn ripping through it. My boyfriend beside me placed a possive arm around my waist his face still pressed into the pillow. "your..not...going...anywhere" he drawled sleepily. "oh jason, don't start this again I've been late three times this week for work because of you" I teased as I batted at the arm holding me tight to the bed. "come on now be a nice doggie and let me go" his eyes shot open at this comment to see me trying to stifle my giggles. "I don't find that funny Tala" he drawled in his no nonsense voice. I rolled my eyes at him and started to slide through his arm off the bed. All of a sudden I found myself thrown off balance and only when I was flat on my tummy on the bed with Jasons hard body pressing me into the mattress did I gain my equilibrium once more. We were both naked of course so he had easy access to whichever part of my body he planned to torment. "no Jason, I'm not playing I told you if I'm late once more my boss will go crazy!" I felt rather the saw the smile I knew was spread accross his face, smug at getting me so easily where he wanted me. "a doggie was it, that you so elegantly called me Tal...I guess I'll have to show you how animalistic I can be" he said as his hand skimmed up my thigh stopping just at the curve of my butt. I could feel his member pressing hard against the crease of my bottom. "you know, you really have gotten disobidient little wolf" he continued stroaking the soft skin of my thigh and tracing a finger along the soft curve of my butt. I stifiled a moan at his attentions not wanting him to know just how riled up he could get me in a matter of seconds. "I don't think you really want to go. You want to know why?" he asked. I grumbled at him to just let me go I'm not in any mood for this. As he heard this he moved his hand slightly upward his fingers teasing then slipping into me easily, he let out a feral growl. "I think you are in the exact mood for this" he said chuckling as I let out a low moan as he withdrew his fingers then slid them in again my butt lifting to meet them.

"damn you Jason" I almost moaned as he continued to slowly fuck me with his long fingers. One hand now holding my arms above my head. I turned my head to grumble at him once more by he caught my lips with his own. His teeth skimming my bottom lip opening my mouth for him. He slipped his tounge into my mouth and kissed me hard, tasting and almost devouring me. I melted at the feel of his powerful fingers within me the movements mirrored by his tounge in my mouth. I was moaning louder now with each passing second my hips moving more franticly. His fingers slipped out then and his mouth left mine. "you had better get ready for work sweety" he drawled his voice steady as if he had not been aroused just moments before. He has got to be kidding me! I thought looking back at him but he was already up and pulling on his jeans. "you asshole" I snarled at him as I lay there trying to catch my breath, on the verge of release but not quite there. 

He smiled, his eyes skimming my body from head to foot. "such a pity you called me a doggie Tal this could have been fun" he laughed as he left the room. Damn him, of all the stupid mutts, argh I thought as I peeled myself up off the bed....(to be continued)


Freya xx

Phone sex

I love the sound of your voice as it washes over me. As I hear it echoing through my mind, deep and comanding. I love how my body responds to you, to even the simplelist of words. Slivers of pleasure pluses through my taunt and aroused body as you describe senarios to me. The only sounds at my end are gasps and moans as my fingers do as they are told. 

I want you here with me now as my body grows more frenzied as your words grow hotter. Your dominant and dirty words for my ears only. You tell me to unbuckle my belt, unbutton my jeans, slip my hand into my panties as You describe what You wish to do to me, what you will do to me. I need you now like a fish needs water, like a human needs air. It is more then a want it Is a need for survival. 

Move your fingers over the soft flesh of your womanly mons, dip a finger into the lips begging to be kissed, feel the wetness there caused only by my words to you. I gasp and moan as I do as you bid, feeling naughty and out of control as the feelings take over any thoughts. If I was there with you now you whisper I would take you in my arms, your back against the wall as I grind my need into your pleasure centre letting you feel how much I want you. My lips teasing yours , nibbling and softly pressing before devouring you body and soul. Eventually I would take you to the bed throw you there ripping clothes in a frenzy to feel flesh against flesh. I would enter you hard and demanding taking everything you offer and more. You would feel me within you pushing deeper and deeper with each and every pounding of our bodies. 

Your moan and hard griping of my shoulders would tell me all I need to know as with one last stroke our world shatters around us the pieces flying apart untill finally all that is left solid is the steady beating of hearts pressed against one another.

I moan as I reach completion and hear your growl as you release. 

I return then to reality my breaths laboured just as yours are. But I feel empty, the actual melding of bodies a stark missing componant in this pleasure filled fantasy. I sigh and you hear it, but you do not mention the sadness I know we both feel. 

Freya xx